I found myself wondering,
- “How did we get here?”
- “How did it get to this point?”
- “Why did we let it?”
It was supposed to be a simple dinner out. Just the two of us. A quick bite.
He mentioned something from work. I asked a question.
And it started.
The argument. We each said words that stung. Neither of us was totally right. Neither of us totally wrong either.
In hindsight, the whole thing was pointless. Stupid. A waste of time.
Before heading to bed, I decided to read a little. Reaching for my book, I glanced at my calendar. The one that always seems to speak to me at the right time. I read:
That was so it…..
We had each responded from our flesh. No Spirit had operated at all. The result had been only flesh. Only ugliness.
I took my book, sat on the couch & continued to read….
That’s how family gets made. Not by ceremonies or certificates, and not by parties and celebrations. Family gets made when you decide to hold hands and sit shoulder to shoulder when it seems like the sky is falling. Family gets made when the world becomes strange and disorienting, and the only face you recognize is his. Family gets made when the futures obscures itself like a solar eclipse, and in the intervening darkness, you decide that no matter what happens in the night, you’ll face it as one.
(Shauna Niequist, Cold Tangerines, page 29)
We talked it through. And we were solidified even more. As we talked, face to face, the only face I saw was his. The face that matters most deeply to me. And the fact that he was looking back at me & my face was the only face he was looking at, caused me to see the face of the Only One that has held our hands & kept us shoulder to shoulder all these years.
It truly has to be Spirit, all Spirit, every day.
**After finishing this post, I later read this tweet & had to include it 🙂
“Marriage does not so much bring you into confrontation with your spouse as confront you with yourself.”
I linked with Inspire Me Monday and Making Your Home Sing and Marriage Mondays and The Better Mom and Hear It, Use It and The Alabaster Jar and The Modest Mom and Playdates With God and Gracelaced Mondays and Monday’s Musings and What I Learned This Week and Teach Me Tuesday and Behind The Scenes and Tell His Story and Cozy Reading Spot and Marriage Mondays .